5 year port.

My new port went in this morning.  Oh well.

I got up at 6:30, put on an acceptable hospital outfit, and walked down to Mt. Sinai.  They’re getting pretty used to me down there.  Maybe I can get some sort of customer reward card.

The surgeon did the procedure without any sedative.. just local.  Yikes.  My face was tented so that I couldn’t watch, but he had an anesthesiology resident scrubbed in with him, and was describing what he was doing with enough detail that I didn’t really NEED to be able to see.  I’ve got a decent imagination.

“So, there you can see the pectoralis, and here, the deltoid..  you follow this line between them seperating the.. ”  Etc..     “Nurse, may I have a rake?”  A RAKE!??  What on earth are you planning to do with a rake?

It’s on the left side this time.  And this time he went into the subclavian vein, instead of the jugular, which I’m guessing will mean that you won’t be able to see the tube running under the skin the way you could on my last one.

The course of treatment has been settled on, and I’ll start on monday.  To say that I’m not looking forward to it would be a little coy.  I am dreading it.  I’ve done it before, so I know what I’m getting into, and that’s just the problem!  This time there will also be the addition of a drug that will make me break out with acne.  I had terrible acne as a teen, and I really hated it..  It was such a blow to confidence!  I hope I’m able to handle it a little better as an adult.  This acne drug also has to be dripped every week, instead of every two..  so it’s going to make the schedule just a little more grueling.

0 Replies to “5 year port.”

  1. I hate this for you, Ez. But if this knocks the shit of any cancer cells that might be floating round, it will be worth it. Hang tough, bother. You did it before, and you can do it again.

  2. I’m really sorry about the sucky morning you had–it’s amazing how BAD buildings-full of people trained to ‘help’ and ‘cure’ are at actually making a person in need of help and cure feel better, emotionally speaking. And the fact that a side effect of your treatment will be getting to revisit painful feelings from adolescence, well, that’s just f**king cruel…
    I’ll be sending healing wishes via the ether xxoo

  3. Forget about the acne – you are married anyway (not as a grow-up when you have to think about finding a girlfriend…) :-)) , as long as you get rid of all those cancer cells as Brent mentioned…

  4. Hey Ez,

    If it makes you feel any better, one of my doctors asked the nurse for a tourniquet for a procedure he was performing on my toe. I wiggled out of position to see just what the hell he was doing and discovered that his “tourniquet” was really a rubber band.

    So, if your doctor(s) ever ask for a scary- or odd-sounding tool for a procedure you’re awake for, just imagine it being a paperclip or a magic marker. Also, you might be able to bring your iPod (or whatever) to listen to during the awful spoken details.

    When Joseph got the staples and stitches removed from his head, neck, and abdomen, a resident performed them. Sure, she was hot, but she didn’t know/care how to lessen the pain. (Yank! Yank! Yank!)

    Love ya both,

    willow

  5. Positive vibes to you and yours. Knowing what’s coming sucks, but it is all for the right reason – health on the other side of treatment. Good luck sounds so inadequate, but I mean it sincerely.

  6. Man, I stared at the pic for a while thinking about how fucking crazy the human body is and just how many changes yours has been forced to go through in such a short time. And somehow you still look like a star.

    Then I went back to the photo one more time and thought, “Damn, that’s an awesome chair!”

    I’m thinking of you as Monday creeps up, Ez. Sad and angry that you have to beat this thing one last time… but so so confident that you can.

    xo

  7. would that the post could be 45 year port and it would be in reference to a lovely adult beverage…

    As it is, fuck cancer.

    And if you haven’t already, get in touch with the folks at CancerCare – they’re based in the city somewhere and do great stuff for people who are dealing with this shit.

    ooh! two curse words in one post! I’m all growed up!

  8. you are beautiful – and yes that is a great chair. you know in a movie they can go, “and six months later…” then you pick up the story there. wish you could do that now. you got a lot of folks pulling for you. lean on your writing & photos, loved ones, friends, family, putney. this is tough, but you are tougher. i often think of that picture of you as a kid yelling at the ocean.

  9. At least you’re still handsome (even w/acne, i’d wager) and your wife is a hotty. Stay strong. Strangers are out here routing for you. Love..peace.

  10. No problems with acne!!! you’re fantastic with or without it!!, Soo much moho for you tomorrow, all my good thoughts and lots of positive energy. Don’t forget you are super Ez, you can climb this mountain, again! come on!

  11. warm thoughts coming your way — maybe one a few of those days when you just have to lie in bed, you can talk to me about photography. i am counting down to joblessness and single parenting — figure i might need a hobby and some adult conversation.