I was hoping to write triumphantly from home tonight about my successful jail break. It was looking good in the early part of the day.
Yesterday they removed everything but the IV. Having no bags hanging around my legs felt like such freedom! My doc told me to walk A LOT. 100 laps in the hallway, he said. I mapped it with google maps pedometer. 100 laps would have been 15 miles. I don’t think he meant it. I did 4 miles. Another 5 today so far. It really does help. Last night was pretty rough. I had a hard time during the day getting my bladder to function properly. Pathetic little pees. It got much worse during the night, and kept me from getting any sleep. At 5:30 this morning I discovered that if I walked a good piece, I’d get a decent pee as a reward, and with it some much needed relief. By the time my docs stopped in at 8:00 I was feeling pretty good. They were both feeling very positive about my progress and said that I could leave as soon as I produced some real stool.
“It’s on!” I thought. I can do this!
Still waiting, I’m afraid.
In the meantime, since percocet has a negative effect on the movement of your bowels, at the suggestion of my doc, i tried cutting the dose in half. Serious mistake. Instead of walking out of here in style, I’ve spent the afternoon writhing around trying to get comfortable. The pain is finally under control, but it’s pretty clear that I’m here for the night. GAH! I was pretty excited about cooking dinner in my own kitchen, and snuggling with my wife and my dog for the night without the beeps and honks of medical equipment all around. Tomorrow!
On a brighter note, they even removed the IV today, so my movements are unrestricted! I’ve still got the tail stuck in my arm so that they can re-connect me overnight should they choose, but it feels great to be free of strings.. like a real boy. I took a sink bath this morning, and put on my street clothes (so sure was I that I’d be leaving!). It’s been pretty funny wandering the halls today, the IV tail, hospital bracelet and funny hospital socks the only evidence that I’m a patient and not a volunteer of some sort.
Blah blah blah.