Mostly just wanted to write an upbeat post.
I’ve been in the shop the last few days. Working slowly and deliberately with full knowledge that if I get so much as a scrape, my mom and doc will string me up. It has felt wonderful. I had the main triangle of Hill’s new commuter/cargo bike all mitered up and ready to braze.. just sitting down there in the jig teasing me. Finally got it together on Sunday. Went out yesterday and did the clean up.. put the dropouts on the chainstays. Today it will become a frame. Ta da. I’m not very strong. But I’m letting the tools do the work. It’s a nice state to be in.. festina lente! One of the best lessons there is.
Being off the chemo is reminding me what it feels like to be whole! Not my old self by any measure, but glimmers of it (I was probably never really my old self, but you know what I mean). I am managing the pain just fine. Gradually cutting down doses of pain killers. My head feels clear. I’m upbeat. All is well. I get six more days of this before heading back in to get topped up. My calculation is that for the next 6 months I probably get every other week. Every day more than that is just a gift for the time being, and I’ll take it!
As I said before, for those who are interested, I will NOT be going to NAHBS. I would prefer to wait another year, until things are clearer with my health, until it won’t interfere with my treatment schedule, and until I’ve had a productive lead in time to work on the projects I’d really like to show. I WILL, however, be finding a way to send the assless bike. The organizer frowns on people sharing booths and that sort of thing, but this bike is such a feel-good bike world story, that I think something might work out. So many of the folks exhibiting helped with it’s inception.. phil wood, chris king, white industries, kirk pacenti, don ferris.. that to have it there with a little note saying “wish I could be here, see you next year.. special thanks to: etc etc..” would just be a nice thing. I think so anyway. I’ll keep you posted.
That seizure is already just a memory. For a day or so afterwards, I was totally exhausted. Like I’d run a marathon or something. Scared too.. I had a couple of nap time nightmares about it. Gone now.