I spent yesterday not eating in preparation for this morning’s colonoscopy. A pretty different experience when you don’t have an asshole!
Got up this morning, and for the second time in the last couple of weeks had to leave the house with no coffee.
I arrived at the colonoscopy store, and leaned my bike up against a sign post. I reached for my lock. No lock. I had remembered a multi tool (had even gone back upstairs for it just before leavint) so that I could remove the seatpost and saddle, but I had walked out the door with no lock. I stood there for a second, dumbfounded. “I’m a pretty good problem solver.. What the fuck am I gonna do here..” Looked at the time. 9:37. 9:45 appointment. 15 minute ride home, and another 15 minutes back. I thought for a second about businesses in the area where I might know someone.. Somewhere that I could stash the thing. Then remembered that I was on the upper east side.
Stopped me dead.
So I shouldered the bike and walked right in the door. Told the doorman, “suite 201.” He asked my name and waved me in. Got on the elevator. Walked into the office. Signed in. Got a colonoscopy. Ta da!
Nobody really blinked.
For those of you keeping score: The scope was entirely clear. No polyps. No nothing. After a clear PetCT and a clear Colonoscopy in quick succession, after a year without treamtent, I’m feeling an incredible sense of relief. On the wobbly ride home (still VERY high on versed and propofol), I realized that I couldn’t remember the last time I felt so relaxed.. such a sense of well being.. Oh yeah. Wait. I could remember. It was the last time that I was hopped up on narcotics.
Oh well. Nice while it lasts.