After getting the port in on wednesday, I was looking forward to four days off with no appointments of any sort. It has gone by pretty quickly, and I’m feeling as though I REALLY haven’t taken advantage of the time. I went out to the shop for a while yesterday, with the best intentions, and ended up just staring blankly at tools. I’m almost relieved to be starting the chemo tomorrow, just so that I can stop ANTICIPATING it. It’s my hope that when I start, I can just get into the rhythm of doing the stuff. Of getting it done. That I’ll get familiar again with just what I’m dealing with, and I’ll be able to roll with it. The last few weeks have just been full of a sort of crippling dread of what’s to come. Once it HAS come, maybe I won’t dread it any more. That’s what I’m hoping.
I remember from last time that getting unplugged on day 3 was like the last day of school. You wake up and know that you only have to make it through that day and then it’s summer vacation. So here’s to wednesday. Looking forward to wednesday.
I have a senses even if small of what you are talking about, the anticipation being worse, I anticipated my dialysis experience to a level of fear and denial that was just nuts, once I started dialysis it was like you say a rhythm.
good luck with your rhythm with it
love to you and all the fam. xoxox!
thinking about you…
Go show that nasty stuff who is in charge Ez!
sending u love thru the wires, ez
Love and best thoughts from South Africa.
Laura and Nigel
Richard and Andrew also send love and strength.
Good luck, Ezra.
hear ye! here’s to wednesday!! xo and strong thoughts your way. courage!!!!
Here’s to Wednesday! Cheers. Praying for your strength and endurance…
You did it before you KNOW you can do it again.
I’ll be thinking of you.
Wednesday!
Steel yourself brother. Strength to you and Hill.
Good luck, Ezra. Good wishes are sent your way.
to Wednesday!
Best wishes from Putney. We are thinking of you and working on a time warp to get you to Wednesday a little bit faster! Hopefully experience will help you get through this a little more easily this time. All our love. Cathy, Todd, Audrey and Nash.
sending love, hugs & strength your way…
xoxo, Kim S.
Mojo mojo mojo mojo
thinking of you ez. good luck.
(picture here a big heart drawn with a red crayon)
Ezra, good luck to you, and thank you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts & fears with all of us……. I know it’ll help you get through this and maybe it helps us, too.
My mother went through years and years of breast cancer (and too many battles with chemotherapy) and she never told me anything like this, and part of me wishes she had. I’m sure she was doing her best to be strong because she had to… but I think a person can only be so strong on their own.
I know you don’t know a lot of the people who follow you on this blog, but we’re all pulling for you. …and you’re going to finish this chemo thing, and it’s going to be very difficult, but then it’ll be done. I know it. :~)
Good luck & thank you. ~P-squared.
I want to tell you good luck but it sounds so trite. How about stay strong!? Don’t let it get you! Fuck cancer, you’re Ezra!
Exactly, Fuck cancer!
good luck, Ez. sending you love and strength. may Wednesday come soon.
Fuck Monday, here’s to Wednesday!!!
Schooolllsss out for summer (wednesday) – Thinking about you kicking some ass today Ez.
You can do this, Ezra! May Wednesday come quickly.
It’s Tuesday and I’m hoping it’s all going well… here’s to tomorrow.
xo
Here’s to Wednesday! We’re sending all our good thoughts for this week to fly by is a flash!
Love,
j,r,s&z
Wednesday. Thoughts are with you, as always. p
Yeah, thanks for calling me on that. Here’s to the day AFTER tomorrow.
Here’s to Wednesday. Sending good thoughts and prayers to you. Always.
thinking of you today
Occasionally, I buy a bag of chocolate. Invariably, I eat too much in one sitting and I hate myself. I find myself eating the rest of the bag just so I won’t have to deal with the temptation tomorrow. I’m not saying my chocolate habit has anything to do with what you’re going through, but it’s human nature to want to confront life’s unpleasantries just to get them over with. I only wish you were worried about your waistline like me.
When I think of you I smile. Good luck.